Hrmm the haze has been around for more than a month and I've been coughing ever since. I guess the Indons are trying to market their protective masks again (refer to last year's blog about this).
Looks like they're really desperate this time around.
The main thing today I would like to talk about is the new high tech toilets in KL. Here's what it's supposed to do. You insert RM1 worth of coins in the slot and a door opens for you to use the toilet. Okay, RM1.... ever since the RM1 coin was abolished, we rely mostly on 50, 20 and 10 cent coins. How often do we even see these coins nowadays? We see more 5 or 1 sen coins thanks to taxes from our fast food restaurants charging us government taxes / service taxes.
Yes, you've all guessed it, the machine probably does not accept 5 or 1 sen coins. Wait, good news, there will be someone who will be in charge of the unit. I have no idea where this person will be placed at but, I'm sure he'll be handy to help us change all our loose change into something this toilet can accept. I think this might be a bad idea/ hassle.
Let's say someone really, I mean REALLY has to go. He ran towards the door and saw a sign asking him to insert at least RM1 in total of coins. He searched his pocket/ wallet but found no small change. All there is was a RM 1 note. Already stuffing his left hand into his anus to hold it in, he ran around the unit looking for someone to change the RM1 note. 1 minute later, still holding it in, he found a passerby who gave him change enough to use the toilet for free (Yea rite... in Malaysia?!). The man then thanked the passerby and ran back towards the door. As he slowly inserted TEN, 10sen coins, one at a time; just when he inserted the last coin, the door which was supposed to open, did not open. Someone is already inside. The money is not returnable.
Well... good thing that was just a worst case scenario i thought of. Hopefully that doesnt happen to any of us.
These toilets arent called high-tech toilets for no reason. It is said to have a self cleaning mekanism which i have no idea how it works. According to the press, it cleans itself up after every 5 users. What will it do? Spray water everywhere? What if someone got stuck in there? Free shower and dry blow, ALL for the price of RM1. Just make sure you're lucky number 5~
Another reason why they called it high-tech toilets. You are only, yes, ONLY limited to 15 mins of usage of the toilet before the door automatically opens up. Dont worry, the door wont just open when it hits 15 mins. On the 14th minute, there will be a warning saying that the door will be opened in one minute. If you wish to continue using the toilet, you'll have to insert yet another RM1.
Fair enough, there will be a warning. What about those with hearing disabilities? On the 14th minute they hear nothing. Then, on the 15th minute though they cant hear it, there'll be laughter all around. So how will the makers of this high tech toilet will counter this? No news so far. I'm guessing maybe they'll put up a warning light ala DISCO BALL!! "Dance like shit"
Now, what about those on wheel chairs? Yes, the designers are thoughtful about them. The doors are big enough and there are handles and etc available for the disabled. There is also the table where you can change the diaper for babies (forgot the name for it =.=). The toilet is also perfumed.
About the materials of the toilet(judging from the picture), it looks like a typical Malaysian made unit. Everything looks like it's made out of plastic. What if there were smokers in there lighting up cigarette? Smoke fills up the whole room. How will the cleansing mekanism cleans this up? What if the person puts out the cigarrete by pressing it against the plastic walls? How will it clean it up? I'm guessing since it is *coughcough* high tech, the moment smoke is detected (nothing about a smoke detector was mentioned, i'm just saying what if there were), another free shower~
Okay I'm saving the best for last....
What if one were to get stuck in the toilet? That's no problem as there will be someone responsible for the unit right? WRONG! I'm guessing it'll be just like our security guard system. They'll probably be sleeping in their own cozy air-conditioned room without a care in the world. Did i mention that the whole toilet is airconditioned? Anyways, even if you DO, press a button in the toilet asking for assistance, I doubt the person incharged will be able to hear thanks to the blasting of his super high tech hi-fi stereo or earphones while watching the girls in revealing clothes walk past by (for guys) or cute hot guys (for female).
Realizing the help button is of no use, you used your handphone to call for help. But wait, if this is so high tech, they probably wouldnt want users to use their handphones while using the unit. So, what do they do? They installed a material that prevents your handphone to send signals out of the unit and signals into the unit. Even better, you're still stuck even though the 15 mins of usage time is up.
Stranded in there, you started pounding on the door screaming for help. You tried kicking, pushing and punching your way out. Thankfully for you, it's Malaysian made (I think it's Malaysian made....) so the lock pops out open quite easily. Remember because this is a high-tech toilet, it has sensors and an alarm system to see if someone is vandalising or destroying the property. Being caught red handed, you explained to the police on what happened including the part where you pressed the help button non stop. Too bad the person incharge denied your statement. The person incharged no doubt IS telling the truth even though the only thing entering his ears are the music of black metal. There was a short circuit in the wiring thus the help button was actually not working. Best part, this happened on the opening day (not real << it's all made up!!!).
Okay time to wrap it up. Remember a few days ago when an ATM machine was pulled out of a bank using a tow-truck? We should expect the same to our high-tech public toilets. Someone will come soon to steal all those syilings.
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I've just gotten word from my sister from one of the teachers from my ex-school, an ex-schoolmate of mine just passed away a few days ago. To those wondering, it's Jagathesan. Yeap, him. Suffering from a weak backbone since he was standard 5, a fan of wrestling and formula 1 racing has passed away. Last I've heard about him, he was in Perth Australia studying bussiness and hoping to take over his father's bussiness. Sorry you were unable to fufil your dreams. Rest in Peace my friend.
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